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hi my name is Benna Sahara and welcome
to another video yesterday someone left
me a comment on my video about squirting
if you haven't seen that video I'll
leave the link in the description below
anyway here's the comments Venus can you
do a video advising women to relax and
let go not and not be afraid to let go
so here it is this video is about how to
let go and enjoy sex I how to let go and
relax in bed ok and I've made some notes
on the back of my electricity bill yes I
have paid it ok so my number one tip
with you how many I've got 1 2 3 4 5
cool top 5 tips ok so the first tip of
course has got to be you got to be with
the right person you know I think it's
well doesn't not talking about it
doesn't have to be a life partner but
the right person at that moment in time
I don't really believe in mr. right as
such I believe in mr. right now
I guess that's cuz I'm because I'm
single but but I think I do already
honest with yourself and and ask
yourself and do you feel comfortable
with that person are they turning you on
and if you have to be really really
honest about those things and if the
answer is no to either of those
questions then that might be a reason
why you're not relaxing in bed because
if you are with the right person then
you should be with someone who makes you
feel relaxed and makes you feel
comfortable whether you've got your
clothes on or off and that's really
really important next thing next point
body confidence I think body confidence
is really important it doesn't and you
don't have to have a perfect body to
have body confidence what I think is
important is to realize that there are
different ways of seeing your body
everything queer thing we're all our own
most harsh harshest judge that we have
on our own bodies but I mean if you're
in bed and someone and your partner is
clearly aroused they're not looking up
the things in your body that they eat
that you think are bad I mean sometimes
I've been with people who have
who have liked a part of my body that
that I thought was not the best part of
my body so you never know how someone
else is perceiving you and I think we
need to relax a bit more about our
bodies and embrace how we are you can
also play with the lighting and play
with lingerie but don't cover yourself
up don't hide yourself in the darkness I
think instead of thinking about what
your body looks like I think you should
think focus on what what it feels like
and that's really important for example
that sensation when you take your top
off and then you press your naked torso
against your partner's naked torso is
just wow and shouldn't be thinking about
anything like stretch marks or fat or
anything like that at that moment in
time it should be just like the warmth
of the skin and and maybe the goosebumps
as well and how now with the cold
weather you just want to get closer and
closer and feel those hands against your
back oh my god you should really be
focusing on on what what it feels like
and all the pleasure that your body can
give you and that's way more important
than thinking oh I don't look like a
model or something okay next thing is to
be present the mind-body connection I
think a lot of times a lot of us can be
guilty of thinking about things and well
a few body issues could be one thing but
also thinking about things that are not
happening though there shouldn't be in
your head at that time you should really
be just focusing on what you're feeling
the physical sensation but also what
you're feeling emotionally and mentally
so I think that thing that's really
really important and just to close your
eyes and think am i enjoying this do I
want to change something I think you
should really be present in your body
and have a mind-body connection when
you're having sex and just yeah so just
don't think about the time or anything
you got what you got to do tomorrow to
just really really enjoy the moment
and point number four to relax and enjoy
I think lots of self not first of us5
sorry lots and lots of foreplay I think
that's a great way to to relax in bed
and especially with a full body massage
I think a full body massage is a great
way to to relax especially just starting
with the neck or the head and the hair I
think a lot of people can just be oh I
become like a pussycat when when I get
tight when I'm touched and caressed and
that can just make me incredibly
incredibly relaxed and I'm definitely up
for enjoying all those caresses so
that's a great way to to to start a
lovemaking session with lots and lots
lots of foreplay and take your time with
taking clothes off and yes I really
really focus on them caresses like
tickles massage mmm so that's a great
way definitely and then of course the
last but not least in self-love as a sex
toy tester this is part of my job I my
mission in life is to raise orgasmic
awareness I think if you are connected
with your body and you are orgasmic and
you masturbate frequently I think that
really helps you when you're with a
partner because you've made a connection
with your body and you've got you enjoy
your body and I think when you enjoy
your body and you can be more demanding
with the sex you have in you you enjoy
it a lot more
so there are my top five tips for how to
relax and let go and enjoy sex I hope
you've enjoyed this video and see you
next time
