How to Be Comfortable Being Alone | Robin Sharma

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hi it's Robin Sharma and welcome to this

mastery session and here is my opening

question how good are you being alone

look at the great geniuses you'll look

at the great women and men of the world

you'll look at the most creative people

you look at people who are building

great businesses they all have one thing

in common they spent a lot of time

thinking and you will never get your

best insights in a noisy restaurant or

being surrounded by your best friends we

live in a world that in many ways says

well if you want to be liked and if you

want to fit in make sure you have a lot

of people around you and your life is

layered with lots of complexity and

shiny toy toys and bells and whistles

Blaise Pascal the French mathematician

said something I've never forgotten he

said most of man's miseries derived by

his inability to sit quietly in a room

by himself

tranquility is the new luxury I'm gonna

repeat that again because it's so

important tranquility is the new luxury

most people in the world right now are

so addicted to distraction there's so

much going on they're exhausted and so

one of the single best moves you can do

to get your best thinking done to get

your best insights to be more

intentional as you go through your days

to amplify your productivity creativity

and prosperity is this make more time to

be alone and to go even deeper make the

time and develop the ability to like

yourself more you know you are the only

person who will be with you your entire

lifetime we're gonna loose loved loved

ones people come and go you are the only

person that will be with you as long as

you are alive and so why not build into

see and fluency with you your

relationship with yourself powerful

point here your relationship with

yourself sets up your relationship with

your spouse the rest of your family your

relationship with yourself is really

what drives your relationship with your

teammates and co-workers your

relationship with yourself sets up your

relationship with money because you will

never have a higher income than your

self-identity your relationship with

yourself drives your performance in your

career your relationship with yourself

sets up your entire relationship with

your world the doorway to success then

swings inward not outward and as you

build that relationship with your finest

self as you build a relationship with

your values as you build the

relationship with your gifts and your

talents as you meditate and contemplate

and reflect on your true wisdom what

starts to happen is you peel away your

ego which is simply the voice of your

fear and you get to know that inner

warrior and that primal genius that

lurks within every human heart you have

it but is your ego screaming more loudly

than your inner hero and if that's the

case then you're not intimate with who

you truly are life's greatest betrayal

is not knowing who you truly are so

where do you get to know your best self

in the twilight of quiet it is in the

tranquility of the early morning hours

or maybe those quiet hours before you go

to sleep where you can pull out a

journal and write about the person

you've always wanted to be it might be

where you meditate on the person you

want to become you might want to pray in

your quiet hours alone about what you

want your life to stand for

I spent a lot of time early in the

morning with my eyes closed

visualizing the life I want to create

all I know is my best thinking Mike my

greatest self excavation my highest

personal growth doesn't happen when I'm

in a room full of people it happens when

I have carved out the time to be alone

that's when I can hear the silent

whispers of my greatest self well you

can't be alone and you won't make time

to be tranquil if you're scared of

yourself you see I believe a lot of

people the reason why they're on their

phones all day long or watching TV all

day long or busy being busy or addicted

to alcohol or medication or gossiping

those are simply flights and escapes

from intimacy with who they truly are

you see what I'm really saying is most

people have all this pain and

self-hatred deep within them so because

they've never processed through that

pain they need to structure their life

to be busy where they're always doing

things because they were scared of being


because when you're alone you not only

start thinking you start feeling I'm

gonna repeat that again because it's so

fundamentally important when you are

alone all your deepest feelings that

you've been resisting come up well is

that hard and uncomfortable it is but

that's where your growth is there's a

concept I teach not only mindset which

everyone's talking about there's a word

I've introduced for the past few years

in my work called heart set and also

health set and soul set but on the heart

set point when you start to feel that

pain and get to know that pain you

release that pain the way to heal a

wound is to feel wound and trust me

every single human being on the planet

unless you're enlightened has wounds and

associated pain and so in the quiet

times yes you could read and yes you can

meditate and yes you can think and yes

you can grow

but you can also go into your heart set

and start processing through

the toxic emotions that are actually

limiting your performance your

creativity productivity prosperity and

impact on humanity so I just want to

remind you a great life has times out in

the world and periods alone in the

wilderness and if you want to be

thoughtful if you want to be a

heavyweight on the planet you want to

dominate your domain if you want to rise

to legendary if you want to live a

beautiful lifestyle it starts with

getting to know who you truly are your

gifts your talents your ego voices your

weakness it's about being alone so you

know your values how you want to live

what your mighty mission is what your

high-value targets are and ultimately

it's about connecting I'm gonna get a

little dangerous here but being alone is

about pondering and reflecting on your

mortality you see the more you think

about how you will have wished you all

have lived when you're no longer here

the more intimacy and fluency you build

with the shortness of life and your

mortality the more and if you do it

every day alone each day will then be a

platform to get closer to how you will

have wished you will have lived at the


that's called an intentional life a

clear life a heroic life and a

leadership life and that's my great wish

for you so make the time to be alone a

lot more often and get comfortable being

alone and then do the work required so

you excavate who you truly are

and bring that light talent genius and

love to a world absolutely

aching for true heroes so I hope this

mastery session has helped you a lot

I've given my heart and soul in this one

so I hope you feel how much I care and I

really want to help you here's what I

would encourage you to do if you have

found this mastery session

Yubel please share it with three people

as quickly as possible and then start

the conversation with them about

everything that you learned number two

if you would like me to mentor you and

you want to go a hundred X deeper into

this kind of material that I've shared

on whether it's neuroscience or the

philosophy or greatness if you really

want to multiply and accelerate your

productivity if you really want to bring

your fire and your primitive and primal

hero is into the world and you're tired

of playing small and you're tired of

limiting yourself well then I would love

to work with you if you're that kind of

person and there is information below on

my monthly mentoring program it's

absolutely world class

it's called Circle of Legends and if you

feel you want to work at legendary and

live that heroic life that I truly

believe you're destined to live check

out the information below in Circle of

Legends and I'd love to be of service to

you in the program finally if you

haven't read my book the 5 a.m. Club oh

I spent 4 years of hard labor working on

the 5 a.m. Club and essentially its 333

pages of me distilling the best ideas

I've learned over two decades working

with billionaires and companies like

Starbucks General Electric Knight Nike

Microsoft IBM and and organizations like

NASA and young presidents associate

organization and so read the 5 a.m. Club

I promise you it will be a tool for

transformation and a manifesto for

absolute mastery to find the book you

can find it online or just go over to

the 5 a.m. and I'm really

excited to share that after you finish

the book at the end of the book there is

a free and I want to emphasize free

because I really want to help you lock

in the 5 a.m. club habit it is the

mother of all habits you get your

morning write your days will be right

your days are world-class you level or a

class weeks quarters and years the

single best move you can make is to join

the 5 a.m. Club run the 20 20 20 formula

that I walk you through in the book

because as you begin your day so

you handcraft your life and I'm excited

to share at the end of the book you will

find details for a free sixty-six day

online program where after you finish

the book for 66 days which is the period

of time required to install a new habit

I will literally mentor you through

morning mastery meditations and videos

at no charge for 66 days until you reach

the point that researchers call

automaticity or it actually becomes

easier to get up at 5:00 a.m. then not

to get up at 5:00 a.m.

final thing I want to share with you a

portion of my royalties on every copy of

the 5 a.m. Club sold goes to fight

leprosy on the planet it's a violent

affliction I am all-in to help fight

leprosy as much as I hum in Li can so

when you invest in a copy of the five AM

Club you not only invest in your growth

and transformation you invest in helping

a child with leprosy live a better life

okay so thank you so much and I'll see

you in the next mastery session and be

great and this is Robin Sharma I hope

you receive great value from this

mastery session if you'd like to receive

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live events personal mastery Academy and

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summer go ahead and visit Robin Sharma