How I Became Confident | Russell Brand

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are you suffering from a lack of

self-confidence right now you sat at

home or out and about watching your

phone headphones on or just those little

earbuds if you've got them again yeah I

don't have any self-confidence people

always think that I'm confident because

I'm a professional show off but I'm

actually quite shy in what you might

call normal social situations because

I'm a professional performer and I've

been performing since I was 15 and doing

stand-up comedy since in my early 20s

and so it's more than half my life

constantly showing off I've developed a

series of persona that are quite good

but I would say confidence is the sense

that you have enough are enough on your

own and don't require things that you

won't be able to get externally ie I say

you think well I know I do need the

support of people but I'm happy that

I'll get them I know I do need a job I'm

happy I'll get a job or whatever you

don't feel like that you're constantly

at a loss in a position of disease I

don't see why people would suffer from a

lack of confidence because I think we

live in this highly comparative and

combustible culture where like you know

say I look at David Beckham like

recently playing for Man United if he

like looks good doesn't he maybe I

should try and play for money

very like honestly comparing yourself to

these difficult to achieve external

emblems but really what I've been told

again and again is the true confidence

and this does seem to be verifiably

truth is when someone embraces and

accepts who they are you know like some

I know people who seem confident who

have the things that I consider to be my

own faults or flaws I say you'll worry

about your own way well there are people

that are bigger than what is advertised

as the standard size that seem to be

really really confident don't they or if

you don't think I could looking enough

or that you don't look good enough naked

or you're not clever enough there are

all manner of people that are what we

could regard as this

efficient of subpar or substandard and

I'm simply using these words to convey

to you the idea that there's an imagined

standard we think we for sure that

imagine standard we judge ourselves we

feel inferior

I suppose lack of confidence is a sort

of it must be comparative it must be

comparative when I think of an obvious

example of where I will might experience

lack of confidence it's that old

nightmare of having a socialized with a

group of say 12 people that don't know

well rather dinner table I don't know

how that has even caught on as an idea

of something to do with time I just

can't stand it mind you I don't you know

drink or take drugs or nothing if I've

to do that I've got to sit at a table

what am I gonna talk about so what I

reckon goes under my mind is one I hold

myself up to a to higher standard of

like oh you've got to be some dazzling

Peter Ustinov Peter Cook one of the

Peters style wit that sitting the table

on a roar with some wonderful anecdote

and I sort of know that that won't

happen and then feel inferior or I want

to be in control of the situation you

can't really be in control of many

situations that's what I'm beginning to

learn that there is little control to be

had you could master a discipline you

could become very good at jujitsu so

then you would feel confident in that

area always going to be someone better

than you and they show extremely bloody

good at it I say that the answers to

feeling of a lack of self-confidence one

don't compare yourself to other people

to find what it is you enjoy doing

devote and dedicate yourself to it free

look at what it is you feel it's not

good enough about you is there anything

that can be done to improve it what

results do you expect to achieve by

improving it say for example let's take

that I heard off of the wonderful brené

Brown that men beat themselves up most

about not being strong enough about

being weak and cooling to burn a brown

women be themselves up most about their

body image right so say it's body image

you don't think your body's right and I

don't feel my body's right at the time

like with whatever I'll exercise more

I'll eat healthier I'll try

get fitter I should examine what it is

I'm anticipating getting from that

because sometimes these things slide

into your mind somehow as a solution

when they're really not going to provide

a solution at all

I sometimes who if I looked better I

feel better I don't think that's the

answer I think that we diagnose our

problem incorrectly nothing wrong we're

trying to be healthy nothing wrong or

try and be fit and you know nothing

probably is nothing more eating well but

assuming that this will somehow provide

a solution can be erroneous that take

the second thing rather than body image

feeling weak well that can only be

comparative isn't it I'm weak compared

to I'm not weak compared to people with

atrophied upper bodies or people that

are immobilized for whatever reason when

I think I'm weak I'm comparing myself to

a type of man and then figure oh I'm not

that type of man I didn't reach the you

know the kind of when I was at school

and thinking oh they are these are hard

lads or when you start going out and

they had to have fights and keep people

dead in and that you know no I'm the one

of them I could get my head kicked in at

any minute you know those kind of ideas

that sort of thread that seam runs

through me still now what I think is

just try and be you all don't live your

life constantly imagining your body

should look better now you might get on

in an imaginary fight it's not gonna be

much peace there try to stay grounded

now like but I do address these things I

do eat well I do do jujitsu

I do do exercise you know like what I'm

saying is is perhaps as a message

perhaps there's something that you could

be listening to and responding to but

don't use it to create a state of

paralysis and self-care condemnation and

that's what a lack of confidence is it's

nice to do with confident people it puts

you at your ease when you do with people

that are genuinely truthfully confident

they're not overbearing like some of the

most confident people I know they're

very easy to be around and their people

have done work on themselves in one way

if we want to feel confident stop

judging yourself do go to work on

yourself hello I'm doing these new

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