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Living for 1000 Years in Bitlife



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so I've always avoided play bit life on

Android and for a good reason

okay number one its weight behind

compared to the iPhone version I mean

really that's it okay I paid a lot of

money to get my iPad it was literally

basically just so I could play a bit

life on on the channel for you guys for

you scrubs out there hi by the way it's

so rude of me not to say hi and a lot of

you scrubs out there that have Android

phone only because not everyone can

afford a frickin iPhone you know I

totally get it I personally prefer

Android but unfortunately the bit life

that's on Android is just not not nearly

as good okay it's far it's behind in

updates and it apparently could have

some bugs so you'll see what I mean it

further out of this episode in bit

life's defense they were actually iOS

developers you know and then I guess

they hires the people that did Android

so they've been you know literally the

entire time catching up to the iPhone

version or the iOS version a bit life

and you know people don't understand

that so they get really really

frustrated apparently they did a

catch-up update on September 21st

Android bita since we're overhauling at

our development of our app to bring you

faster updates again a lot of people

been complaining about that so of course

they wanted to do that expect a lot more

content in the weeks ahead this is the

catch-up update number one then this is

the list of stuff they added apparently

adding this book the game entirely and

so for the first time I'm gonna be

playing the Android version because

apparently you can wait till like a

thousand years old the dog Oh master

tweeted me this today my bit life is

severely broken help

oh my God look at 1950 seven years old

that's old school right there I've

always wanted to know what happens when

you live it's a freaking like way pass

to what you're supposed to live I think

the most that you could do it before it

was broken was like 200 years old so

what's gonna happen where we live up to

a thousand if we can 340 for like oh my

god people will never reviews didn't

have a very good things to say about I

don't think my mom kept on Aging in

eighty to the point where she is

thirteen hundred years old she has a job

I can't make any money

now I love bit life and I love the

developers they've been super nice to me

I mean I'm even on the ads a bit life

which is like really crazy to me but but

you guys have to understand that

developing for Android and developing

for iPhones or iOS is probably a lot

different and I'm sure they're trying

their hardest I'm sure there's a small

team but yeah you just let's play this

okay it's not the game's fault it's it's

the bluestacks fault oh my god that's

lag the main you still others showing up

come on oh oh now it's doing you facts

of life your father sits you down east

ways that are two secrets to pit life

that you need to understand the cool

thing about the Android version is they

actually do add new things that the iOS

like this that's just a new update on

the iOS which I doubt it I don't think

I've ever seen anything quite like this

ISO this this stuff is completely new I

even even the font is like different so

like there are differences between the

two versions I feel like also that the

bit life on Android looks like more

crisp if that makes any sense I can't

stand that word crisp alright I hate

that word but like I don't know how to

explain it just looks better I guess on

the Android to me this is the birds and

the bees I know I don't get it your

father sighs he says you really need to

pay attention because your bit life

depends on it

maybe I just haven't seen this because

III have not new to the game maybe I

don't know this just keeps me I don't

get it oh you're just gonna keep saying

the same thing alright oh my god you're

right you're afraid clearance is how

sitting down to dine did dinner but the

food looks kind of disgusting what will

you do slip it to the dog alright I know

this kind of doesn't run the best so

it's running a little better now but I

just want to see how long will we

actually live I'm starting to realize I

could do anything if I set my mind to it

oh I can't wait to see what kind of cool

videos have been recorded on the

camcorder I found it my mom's underwear

drawer oh sweet to the water grocery

store a few friends one of them slightly

sips a snicker candy bar into her pocket

she doesn't even says it's the thigh

finger discount

are you guys know my story of stealing

from Walmart okay I actually never told

this story before but I accidentally

stole like a candy bar from

I store before I because I put it like I

had it in my hand and I don't know if

anyone's ever done this but I had the

candy part in my hand and I was walking

around the store for a while and I

decided like I was holding it for a

while without like thinking about it and

I decided okay I'm not gonna get

anything because I forgot I was holding

the candy bar I literally walked out of

the store and then I'm like I got a few

steps out I was like wait yeah crap I

was like oh no I stole this that's when

the freaking cops come tackle me with my

luck that probably would have happened

but luckily I just walked back in so you

know I stole something but like luckily

I'm a good Samaritan oh---but life with

ads it's so weird okay cuz I've been a

bit as it for so long this kind of runs

bad I know but I'm just starting to

wonder is it the Android that actually

just is just like this or is it actually

my computer I don't know what is this

road side me no u-turns I've never I've

literally never gotten a sign before

until this until this freaking uh

Android yeah at age 17 of probably

what's gonna be a very very long life

I've decided to try a gluten-free diet

for eight weeks does that mean that

we're gonna be Ellie imagine we can live

to like a thousand years old even if we

were working at McDonald's we'd be rich

like that's a lot of years working

alright what if I don't want to go to

education or go to school Wow old Pope's

you have been diagnosed with bowel pulps

well can't we even die I mean I guess so

the pictures will be seen did show that

people died but for some reason I don't

know what caused it they just took

forever to die so in this version we get

to spend time with also it's not that

guy that's really not that behind

I don't even actually know what's what's

like you know behind right now oh so

there's no time machine in this one okay

that's one thing okay I hope I don't die

we need some money so I guess we gotta

get a job I swear these emojis are like

updated something's different hey this

looks better I guess hey let's be a crew

member at the hourglass pots while at

the gym you met a male named Christian

gobble at age 17 okay he's great yes I

would like to ask him on a date

what what what your charge of dating a

minor oh I didn't even I did not even I

would I'd read it out loud and I

literally didn't freaking see his age I

forgot that you could even do this I

feel like I haven't done this in a long

time like oh god I've been found not

guilty freaking sweet all right to be

fair I didn't even actually know what

country we were in because I started a

random life all right that's just to be

fair here

oh my health is gonna like okay I'm

gonna die I think I need a doctor now my

happiness is zero why did I get so

depressed all of a sudden probably cuz I

got arrested yeah that'll do it a brain

told me that regular massaging your

ovaries can really help to raise your

self-esteem is that the thing girls do

is this should I make it up the video

about girls secrets how do you even do

that I've been reflecting about the

irony the children in the backseat cause

accidents while accidents in the

backseat cause children Oh after you use

the bathroom at work you realize there's

no soap to wash your hands in the

restroom what will you do needs to wash

hands I swear people that do that I have

I have a bone to pick with you how dare

you there's third world countries out

there that don't have soap but you're

too lazy to wash your hands especially

guys I've seen it so many times ad trap

leisure while surfing the web you land

on a clickbait website I wanted the

secrets to losing weight the scientists

in China don't want you to know you lied

on clickbait website that claims to have

100 of the most mesmerizing photographs

ever taken flick through all hundred on

the Friday you forget to eat before I

shipped it you're fast refresh we've

been working at this fast-food

restaurant for like like 40 years that's

a long time my god I must really like

I'm like what am i sponged Bob you

forget to eat before I shift at your

fast food restaurant and you're now

starving while working load up on fries

I ain't gonna lie when I worked at when

I worked at fast food I would sneak a

fry every now and then all right it's a

wrong probably but is it was a good yeah

David's mom Sakai got him he stole

things so I just wondered as well like

if we're gonna if we do live a long time

does that mean our whole family's gonna

die

maybe we should it's like I start having

kids as well huh we have a sister

available a bunch of nieces and nephews

we should start pumping out those kids

and we're 50 actually now I don't even

know if we can even do that I was so

busy working in my fast food restaurant

jobs I didn't even think to get some you

know love oh sweet okay somebody's gonna

date me but can't we have kids you've

been offered a mojito no thanks I'll

pass so I think what we need to avoid

obviously is dying from causes that we

could avoid but old age is the big thing

okay my mom's dead my mom only had

$1,000 Oh God your brain confesses that

he's considered becoming a sugar daddy

for a girl who is not even half his age

how are you responding with my

unconditional love and support

go get it your gynecologist has a deal

where you get a free to light

labiaplasty after didn't pap smear test

you've been insecure about your life

okay all right light it sad words to me

in every single way Oh has anyone ever

won money from these ads I really want

to know I would love to know like an

honest answer

hey there we go hey we're looking good

for 62 year old I mean our hope is great

maybe the glitch is like we have such

amazing health as so after 62 years we

have almost $200,000

okay we're living a pretty comfortable

life I finally got a pay raise listen

you've been working 60 years at the

krusty krab over here all right it's

about time we give you a small pay raise

very generous generous Brian retired oh

yeah we didn't even start having kids

ding

we're all old dudes have a baby oh he

doesn't want to have a baby with me but

hey I am a general manager now well he

wants to break up with me because my

bestie you just wait till I'm a thousand

years old then people will want me all

right we're getting there

we're 71 years old right now while

trying to get into your friend's car do

you realize that you just got into a

stranger's car I've literally done this

in my life

it's scary I probably save it for

another video or something but I did

this with my grandma my sister we got

into the wrong car at Walmart okay a lot

of my stories involve Walmart okay he

just went there today yeah we got in the

wrong car and it was terrifying

it was the same card you know in our

defense but it's like you know you don't

want the other person to think that

you're stealing their cars so thank God

they didn't see us hard candy you've

decided to which candy to use to fill up

your candy dish on your coffee table

it's peppermint hard candy that's an old

person's candy what kind of young person

actually likes peppermint candy none you

won't find them anywhere okay say with

black licorice how do they stay in

business why do they continue to make

black licorice it's just it's horrible

your ex-boyfriend wants to get back

together with you he says he doesn't

sleep well without the sound of your

snoring oh my god

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smite you can't see but my dog is down

here being freaking crazy I'm trying to

be I wish you could see yours so let's

get back together with him yeah he's

doing what was still alive at 76 years

old what he tells you that you walk like

a monkey would you wear high heels

alright hope he'll come crawling back

okay he can't he can't they ignored this

78 year old what he was okay he says he

misses conversing with you luckily I

have Alzheimer's okay so like I forgot

Ryan and I have been together for 20

years except we've broken up twice

you're my boyfriend right often needs

help walking up stairs not me my freakin

health is kind of all right I guess we

should go to the gym can we go to the

gym at this little I've seen some pretty

old people in the gym and I think it's

great I think no matter what you should

always take care of yourself all right

I'm finally actually like spending money

we just need good health that's all that

really actually matters oh he's dead

he's dead he's dead we got to spend his

final years together like as a couple

it's so sweet all right so far I'm out

living everyone my big suit my big

sister Kim is okay obviously I'm not

happy because my boyfriend died I guess

we did really forget that you broke up

with this twice like within a year all

right list our happiness because I want

I want to be healthy as a horse to live

as long as we can I've had bunions my

whole life they can't cure my bunions is

that really something that can't be

cured I really don't know much about it

so like I don't know it could be a

really horrible thing I just don't know

where it is realize that we'd be going

to the same doctor so

the doctors died I guess we're gonna

find out my nephew Hulbert retire my

nephew retired like that's your old when

your nephews retiring I'm still working

at 86 years old as a pre key is it fast

food oh there it goes Kim she died of

old age I should really exercise that 89

I'm so happy though alright 90 years old

man we're about to any kind of

achievements if we're gonna get with age

we're probably gonna get them oh my

nephew's dead my nephew's dead don't

tell me they fixed it that was too

normal

I need to figure out why didn't it

happen to me so I'm gonna try to copy

everything this hat this person has

there a female cuz like there's gotta be

some kind of glitch they have so many

diseases my god that's so many diseases

so we need to try to recreate as many

like factors you know and just see what

happens all right for this one I'm just

gonna I'm just gonna gun it I don't I'm

gonna do everything I'm just gonna go

fast like yeah the thing is is they

never cured their diseases so I don't

know how they did that oh my god now

what has happened with the sound we're

definitely getting some glitches

oh thank his walking corpse syndrome so

I'm trying on my phone sue to see if

anything changed okay I died of my phone

piece of crap I don't know if you guys

can see it but I got another glitch it's

not the old age glitch but it's I'm one

years old and I'm dead I wasn't one when

I just when I died by the way it just

says someone now and like I can

literally just keep going and it always

says 1 years old and I can go as much as

I want but I'm dead so I think I'm on to

something I'm trying to get there you're

that the sound of dying that's the

problem

I'm so mad because I've been trying for

almost two hours now and I couldn't get

it the closest thing I could get was

turning one over and over and over again

so I think that may have been the glitch

but after scouring online like

everywhere anyone who's that got it

nobody could explain how they got it it

just seems to happen so I don't know if

they somehow fixed it and I don't know

it seems like

say to update anyway I have no idea if

you got it send me a picture on Twitter

I would like to see it okay cuz a lot of

people did it just not me and I'm the

only winner right here making a youtube

video it's just perfect this person was

an infant for 30 years you know what

time it is today scrub of the day goes

to

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redundant master

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