How to live
1000 Years In Bitlife
Living for 1000 Years in Bitlife
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so I've always avoided play bit life on
Android and for a good reason
okay number one its weight behind
compared to the iPhone version I mean
really that's it okay I paid a lot of
money to get my iPad it was literally
basically just so I could play a bit
life on on the channel for you guys for
you scrubs out there hi by the way it's
so rude of me not to say hi and a lot of
you scrubs out there that have Android
phone only because not everyone can
afford a frickin iPhone you know I
totally get it I personally prefer
Android but unfortunately the bit life
that's on Android is just not not nearly
as good okay it's far it's behind in
updates and it apparently could have
some bugs so you'll see what I mean it
further out of this episode in bit
life's defense they were actually iOS
developers you know and then I guess
they hires the people that did Android
so they've been you know literally the
entire time catching up to the iPhone
version or the iOS version a bit life
and you know people don't understand
that so they get really really
frustrated apparently they did a
catch-up update on September 21st
Android bita since we're overhauling at
our development of our app to bring you
faster updates again a lot of people
been complaining about that so of course
they wanted to do that expect a lot more
content in the weeks ahead this is the
catch-up update number one then this is
the list of stuff they added apparently
adding this book the game entirely and
so for the first time I'm gonna be
playing the Android version because
apparently you can wait till like a
thousand years old the dog Oh master
tweeted me this today my bit life is
severely broken help
oh my God look at 1950 seven years old
that's old school right there I've
always wanted to know what happens when
you live it's a freaking like way pass
to what you're supposed to live I think
the most that you could do it before it
was broken was like 200 years old so
what's gonna happen where we live up to
a thousand if we can 340 for like oh my
god people will never reviews didn't
have a very good things to say about I
don't think my mom kept on Aging in
eighty to the point where she is
thirteen hundred years old she has a job
I can't make any money
now I love bit life and I love the
developers they've been super nice to me
I mean I'm even on the ads a bit life
which is like really crazy to me but but
you guys have to understand that
developing for Android and developing
for iPhones or iOS is probably a lot
different and I'm sure they're trying
their hardest I'm sure there's a small
team but yeah you just let's play this
okay it's not the game's fault it's it's
the bluestacks fault oh my god that's
lag the main you still others showing up
come on oh oh now it's doing you facts
of life your father sits you down east
ways that are two secrets to pit life
that you need to understand the cool
thing about the Android version is they
actually do add new things that the iOS
like this that's just a new update on
the iOS which I doubt it I don't think
I've ever seen anything quite like this
ISO this this stuff is completely new I
even even the font is like different so
like there are differences between the
two versions I feel like also that the
bit life on Android looks like more
crisp if that makes any sense I can't
stand that word crisp alright I hate
that word but like I don't know how to
explain it just looks better I guess on
the Android to me this is the birds and
the bees I know I don't get it your
father sighs he says you really need to
pay attention because your bit life
depends on it
maybe I just haven't seen this because
III have not new to the game maybe I
don't know this just keeps me I don't
get it oh you're just gonna keep saying
the same thing alright oh my god you're
right you're afraid clearance is how
sitting down to dine did dinner but the
food looks kind of disgusting what will
you do slip it to the dog alright I know
this kind of doesn't run the best so
it's running a little better now but I
just want to see how long will we
actually live I'm starting to realize I
could do anything if I set my mind to it
oh I can't wait to see what kind of cool
videos have been recorded on the
camcorder I found it my mom's underwear
drawer oh sweet to the water grocery
store a few friends one of them slightly
sips a snicker candy bar into her pocket
she doesn't even says it's the thigh
finger discount
are you guys know my story of stealing
from Walmart okay I actually never told
this story before but I accidentally
stole like a candy bar from
I store before I because I put it like I
had it in my hand and I don't know if
anyone's ever done this but I had the
candy part in my hand and I was walking
around the store for a while and I
decided like I was holding it for a
while without like thinking about it and
I decided okay I'm not gonna get
anything because I forgot I was holding
the candy bar I literally walked out of
the store and then I'm like I got a few
steps out I was like wait yeah crap I
was like oh no I stole this that's when
the freaking cops come tackle me with my
luck that probably would have happened
but luckily I just walked back in so you
know I stole something but like luckily
I'm a good Samaritan oh---but life with
ads it's so weird okay cuz I've been a
bit as it for so long this kind of runs
bad I know but I'm just starting to
wonder is it the Android that actually
just is just like this or is it actually
my computer I don't know what is this
road side me no u-turns I've never I've
literally never gotten a sign before
until this until this freaking uh
Android yeah at age 17 of probably
what's gonna be a very very long life
I've decided to try a gluten-free diet
for eight weeks does that mean that
we're gonna be Ellie imagine we can live
to like a thousand years old even if we
were working at McDonald's we'd be rich
like that's a lot of years working
alright what if I don't want to go to
education or go to school Wow old Pope's
you have been diagnosed with bowel pulps
well can't we even die I mean I guess so
the pictures will be seen did show that
people died but for some reason I don't
know what caused it they just took
forever to die so in this version we get
to spend time with also it's not that
guy that's really not that behind
I don't even actually know what's what's
like you know behind right now oh so
there's no time machine in this one okay
that's one thing okay I hope I don't die
we need some money so I guess we gotta
get a job I swear these emojis are like
updated something's different hey this
looks better I guess hey let's be a crew
member at the hourglass pots while at
the gym you met a male named Christian
gobble at age 17 okay he's great yes I
would like to ask him on a date
what what what your charge of dating a
minor oh I didn't even I did not even I
would I'd read it out loud and I
literally didn't freaking see his age I
forgot that you could even do this I
feel like I haven't done this in a long
time like oh god I've been found not
guilty freaking sweet all right to be
fair I didn't even actually know what
country we were in because I started a
random life all right that's just to be
fair here
oh my health is gonna like okay I'm
gonna die I think I need a doctor now my
happiness is zero why did I get so
depressed all of a sudden probably cuz I
got arrested yeah that'll do it a brain
told me that regular massaging your
ovaries can really help to raise your
self-esteem is that the thing girls do
is this should I make it up the video
about girls secrets how do you even do
that I've been reflecting about the
irony the children in the backseat cause
accidents while accidents in the
backseat cause children Oh after you use
the bathroom at work you realize there's
no soap to wash your hands in the
restroom what will you do needs to wash
hands I swear people that do that I have
I have a bone to pick with you how dare
you there's third world countries out
there that don't have soap but you're
too lazy to wash your hands especially
guys I've seen it so many times ad trap
leisure while surfing the web you land
on a clickbait website I wanted the
secrets to losing weight the scientists
in China don't want you to know you lied
on clickbait website that claims to have
100 of the most mesmerizing photographs
ever taken flick through all hundred on
the Friday you forget to eat before I
shipped it you're fast refresh we've
been working at this fast-food
restaurant for like like 40 years that's
a long time my god I must really like
I'm like what am i sponged Bob you
forget to eat before I shift at your
fast food restaurant and you're now
starving while working load up on fries
I ain't gonna lie when I worked at when
I worked at fast food I would sneak a
fry every now and then all right it's a
wrong probably but is it was a good yeah
David's mom Sakai got him he stole
things so I just wondered as well like
if we're gonna if we do live a long time
does that mean our whole family's gonna
die
maybe we should it's like I start having
kids as well huh we have a sister
available a bunch of nieces and nephews
we should start pumping out those kids
and we're 50 actually now I don't even
know if we can even do that I was so
busy working in my fast food restaurant
jobs I didn't even think to get some you
know love oh sweet okay somebody's gonna
date me but can't we have kids you've
been offered a mojito no thanks I'll
pass so I think what we need to avoid
obviously is dying from causes that we
could avoid but old age is the big thing
okay my mom's dead my mom only had
$1,000 Oh God your brain confesses that
he's considered becoming a sugar daddy
for a girl who is not even half his age
how are you responding with my
unconditional love and support
go get it your gynecologist has a deal
where you get a free to light
labiaplasty after didn't pap smear test
you've been insecure about your life
okay all right light it sad words to me
in every single way Oh has anyone ever
won money from these ads I really want
to know I would love to know like an
honest answer
hey there we go hey we're looking good
for 62 year old I mean our hope is great
maybe the glitch is like we have such
amazing health as so after 62 years we
have almost $200,000
okay we're living a pretty comfortable
life I finally got a pay raise listen
you've been working 60 years at the
krusty krab over here all right it's
about time we give you a small pay raise
very generous generous Brian retired oh
yeah we didn't even start having kids
ding
we're all old dudes have a baby oh he
doesn't want to have a baby with me but
hey I am a general manager now well he
wants to break up with me because my
bestie you just wait till I'm a thousand
years old then people will want me all
right we're getting there
we're 71 years old right now while
trying to get into your friend's car do
you realize that you just got into a
stranger's car I've literally done this
in my life
it's scary I probably save it for
another video or something but I did
this with my grandma my sister we got
into the wrong car at Walmart okay a lot
of my stories involve Walmart okay he
just went there today yeah we got in the
wrong car and it was terrifying
it was the same card you know in our
defense but it's like you know you don't
want the other person to think that
you're stealing their cars so thank God
they didn't see us hard candy you've
decided to which candy to use to fill up
your candy dish on your coffee table
it's peppermint hard candy that's an old
person's candy what kind of young person
actually likes peppermint candy none you
won't find them anywhere okay say with
black licorice how do they stay in
business why do they continue to make
black licorice it's just it's horrible
your ex-boyfriend wants to get back
together with you he says he doesn't
sleep well without the sound of your
snoring oh my god
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smite you can't see but my dog is down
here being freaking crazy I'm trying to
be I wish you could see yours so let's
get back together with him yeah he's
doing what was still alive at 76 years
old what he tells you that you walk like
a monkey would you wear high heels
alright hope he'll come crawling back
okay he can't he can't they ignored this
78 year old what he was okay he says he
misses conversing with you luckily I
have Alzheimer's okay so like I forgot
Ryan and I have been together for 20
years except we've broken up twice
you're my boyfriend right often needs
help walking up stairs not me my freakin
health is kind of all right I guess we
should go to the gym can we go to the
gym at this little I've seen some pretty
old people in the gym and I think it's
great I think no matter what you should
always take care of yourself all right
I'm finally actually like spending money
we just need good health that's all that
really actually matters oh he's dead
he's dead he's dead we got to spend his
final years together like as a couple
it's so sweet all right so far I'm out
living everyone my big suit my big
sister Kim is okay obviously I'm not
happy because my boyfriend died I guess
we did really forget that you broke up
with this twice like within a year all
right list our happiness because I want
I want to be healthy as a horse to live
as long as we can I've had bunions my
whole life they can't cure my bunions is
that really something that can't be
cured I really don't know much about it
so like I don't know it could be a
really horrible thing I just don't know
where it is realize that we'd be going
to the same doctor so
the doctors died I guess we're gonna
find out my nephew Hulbert retire my
nephew retired like that's your old when
your nephews retiring I'm still working
at 86 years old as a pre key is it fast
food oh there it goes Kim she died of
old age I should really exercise that 89
I'm so happy though alright 90 years old
man we're about to any kind of
achievements if we're gonna get with age
we're probably gonna get them oh my
nephew's dead my nephew's dead don't
tell me they fixed it that was too
normal
I need to figure out why didn't it
happen to me so I'm gonna try to copy
everything this hat this person has
there a female cuz like there's gotta be
some kind of glitch they have so many
diseases my god that's so many diseases
so we need to try to recreate as many
like factors you know and just see what
happens all right for this one I'm just
gonna I'm just gonna gun it I don't I'm
gonna do everything I'm just gonna go
fast like yeah the thing is is they
never cured their diseases so I don't
know how they did that oh my god now
what has happened with the sound we're
definitely getting some glitches
oh thank his walking corpse syndrome so
I'm trying on my phone sue to see if
anything changed okay I died of my phone
piece of crap I don't know if you guys
can see it but I got another glitch it's
not the old age glitch but it's I'm one
years old and I'm dead I wasn't one when
I just when I died by the way it just
says someone now and like I can
literally just keep going and it always
says 1 years old and I can go as much as
I want but I'm dead so I think I'm on to
something I'm trying to get there you're
that the sound of dying that's the
problem
I'm so mad because I've been trying for
almost two hours now and I couldn't get
it the closest thing I could get was
turning one over and over and over again
so I think that may have been the glitch
but after scouring online like
everywhere anyone who's that got it
nobody could explain how they got it it
just seems to happen so I don't know if
they somehow fixed it and I don't know
it seems like
say to update anyway I have no idea if
you got it send me a picture on Twitter
I would like to see it okay cuz a lot of
people did it just not me and I'm the
only winner right here making a youtube
video it's just perfect this person was
an infant for 30 years you know what
time it is today scrub of the day goes
to
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redundant master
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