How To Get A Guy To Notice You At A Party - 5 Simple Techniques... (Matthew Hussey, Get The Guy)

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the very charming and eloquent Stephen

Fry once said there's nothing I hate

more than a party I've felt this way

many times in my life where I walk into

a party and I didn't really feel

comfortable I felt very much on the

outside looking in on what was going on

I didn't feel integrated I didn't feel

part of the conversations and I just

didn't feel like I was having as much

fun as perhaps I should so I wanted to

do a video for all of you out there who

have had the same experience and want to

know specifically how to get that person

you want to notice you at the party and

I have five ways that are not only going

to get someone to notice you but also

are going to make a party more fun and

make you feel more engaged with the

energy in the atmosphere that's going on

around you because of course it should

be fun number one put yourself in a high

traffic area at the party that means not

doing what a lot of people do where they

go and find a corner of a room to sit

down and they remove themselves

systematically from what's going on you

need to position yourself in a place

where people are walking past you to go

to get a drink or to use the restroom

you're in a high traffic zone which

means you have proximity to everybody

and it's much easier for them to turn

their head and say something than if you

were on the other side of the room they

had to walk over to you number two

position yourself for eye contact now

you may be in a high traffic zone where

lots of people are walking by but it's

still useless if you have your back to

the action you don't want to be the

person for example who's talking to

somebody here and the wall is behind

them so you have your back to the room

you want to be faced out to everybody

else so that if you have a moment where

you can break eye contact with the

person you're with and look out to the

room maybe they're talking to somebody

else and you can kind of stand there and

people watch and make eye contact you

want to be able to do that it not only

gives you a chance to kind of spy people

you're attracted to but it gives people

you're attracted to a chance to see you

and have a moment of connection before

conversation number three adopt a host

mindset the most successful people at

parties are the ones who almost act like

it's their party and I don't mean in an


why I mean they introduced themselves

like they really have a reason to if you

watch the host of a venue or a party

they walk around with this excuse to

talk to people they say hey how are you

having a good night they talk to people

in that manner it's the same way with

owners of restaurants they walk around

to people with tables who don't even

know they're the owner but they say you

know you have it you enjoying your meal

you're having a good time I know I'm

always looking for that person who will

look at me and say hey how are you they

may not be the host but when they behave

like the host I suddenly feel really

greeted in this place I suddenly feel

welcomed we need to be the person that

does that for other people you need no

excuse to talk to other people if you

just have a warm friendly welcoming

energy like the host people will want to

be around you because guess what there

at the party wishing they knew more

people to number four if you want to

avoid small talk talk about things you

actually care about see the opposite of

small talk isn't big talk the opposite

of small talk is passionate talk is talk

about things we actually care about and

are invested in now those don't have to

be big deep and meaningful subjects they

could be silly superficial things but

silly superficial things that actually

entertain us things were invested in you

could start talking to someone where

they say hey how are you and they shake

your hand and you say I'm great I'm

loving the fact that Nellie ride with me

is playing in the background right now I

haven't heard that song in 10 years and

it still was catchy as it was then then

they get to start talking about song

that does it to them or whether they

like that song or not they get to laugh

about it it gets you in at 40 mile an

hour instead of 10 mile an hour where

you say I'm good thanks how are you

number five don't be a caterpillar be a

butterfly I think this is particularly

profound as an idea because the

caterpillar moves very slowly around the

room the butterfly does its little dance

fluttering around the room touching here

touching there showing its beauty

everywhere it goes and there's something

hard to hold on to about the butterfly

you sort of want it to stay but you

never know when it's going to leave and

go to a different spot I think we should

be having interactions frequent and

often and we shouldn't get stuck with

one person now that doesn't mean we kind

of a meaningful conversation with

somebody sometimes we do have a

conversation for 30 minutes with

somebody because we really like their

company and we're having a

right time with them what I don't want

is for us to get stuck with someone just

because it's comfortable if you are

stuck with someone be with them because

it's great and they're enjoyable when

you're having a great time with them but

not because it's now your default

because it's harder to go and meet

somebody else and take a risk to go

through that comfort zone again what

this comes down to is three things that

really make a difference to the amount

of opportunity we create in our love


the first is lifestyle and lifestyle is

the thing that means you're at the party

in the first place because you have that

kind of life the second part is the

ability to be approachable you're the

type of person that people look at and

think huh I'd like to go over to that

person or it would be easy to go over to

that person because they've made it easy

for me and the third part is taking

risks being the kind of person that

values opportunity more than they fear

rejection I have a program called

attract any man that does exactly these

three things it shows you how to create

a rich lifestyle that brings in new men

it shows you how to become approachable

so that wherever you are from the coffee

shop to the bar you're the type of

person that men want to approach and it

shows you how to start taking risks and

be brave enough to do that because

that's not just a competence thing it's

a mindset thing it shows you how to get

over that fear of rejection and actually

start doing things so check it out it's

called attract any man will link it up

here I can't wait to see what you think

of it and as always I will see you in

next week's video thank you so much guys