Hm.
I was gonna say my hair looks kind of acceptable, which was ironic, because I was about to make
a video about bad haircuts, but, um... it actually doesn't look too bad.
Oh no, wait, maybe it does.
Oh good!
Great, it does look terrible.
Hello, Humans!
Art imitates life.
I got a haircut.
And it went great, as you can tell by the title of this video.
Some of you might be thinking it's not that bad.
Well, you're wrong.
The anxiety before a haircut is a very specific kind of anxiety.
Will it look better, or will it look worse?
Will I look like a Tim Burton character or like Tim Burton himself?
Will I look like an Instagram model, or just a regular model?
Because that would be horrible.
Should I just shave it, and be done?
We've all been there.
So in this week's How To Human, I'll be teaching you how to recover from a bad haircut.
Groundbreaking stuff, like always.
Firstly, consider what the damage is.
Did the hairdresser completely rip your scalp off - that's a little violent.
Did the hairdresser completely rip your - hm.
Are you bald now?
Or is it just kind of choppy and weird, like mine?
It's probably just a bit choppy and weird.
Unless you famously asked for just a centimetre off the top and the hairdresser went: "okay,
so this much?"
No, just a centimetre.
"Okay, so about this much?"
No, no, just a centimetre.
"Okay, here we go."
Everything looks and feels better after a shower, including your outlook on life and
your appearance, so go get wet.
This part of you, specifically.
Get that wet.
Go rinse your hair.
Pretend I'm in the shower!
Maybe wash your hair, if necessary.
Pretend I'm washing my hair!
And then give it a quick blow-dry.
I can do this one!
If nothing else this will have made you look a little bit cleaner, which can never hurt.
Try fixing it yourself.
[scissor noises] And then think better of it, because you have the coordination of someone
who should not be holding sharp things.
This is true.
Try styling it differently.
Wear it up, wear it down, wear it side-to-side, part it in the middle.
I'm not gonna demonstrate any of those because I don't want to make my hair look any worse
than it already does.
If nothing else is working so far then the next logical step is to try and cover it up.
Much better.
Much better!
Much better [coughing].
Much better.
But you can't conceal it forever.
It's like repressing your emotions, it just... eventually it will come out.
In very ugly ways.
That got a little much, for this YouTube channel.
So just wear it, out loud and proud.
Tell people it's ironic.
It's ironic!
I didn't need to act that one out.
Pretend you got it cut that way on purpose, because you don't care how you look, and you
want everyone to know that you don't care how you look, so you made a conscious effort
to look a certain way in order to let people know that.
Who am I directing this at?
And if all else fails... just know that I'm right here with you.
Thanks for watching this video, if you liked it you can subscribe because I post videos
every Tues - that sounded very robotic.
Thank you for watching this video, if you...
I can't self-promote, I just, this is too...
I make videos every Tuesday and Friday, if you like 'em, subscribe.
There, that feels much better when I look uncomfortable.
When I look uncomfortable, I feel more comfortable.
Follow me on Twitter as well.
This is much easier.
I post previews of my videos on Twitter the day before they're released so you can get
a little sneak peek if you go follow me there.
Um, that's all.
See you on Tuesday, goodbye!