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5 Essential Parenting Tips #4 - Dealing with Anger & Aggression | Supernanny



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with that off at work it was time to

address the serious violent behavior

Zach so I came up with this little funny

game to help Zach be more tender and

loving mummy is going to touch you with

one of those things and you have to

guess what it might be oh that's easy

for me

great he could hardly contain himself

because he was so anxious to guess at

which which item it was a pure gold

maybe the feather have a gasps yes a

blue moon okay mommy's gonna do one more

okay if you close your eyes now you have

to feel the next touch okay

I have a guess mom what if your hand oh

yeah it's not the touching game was

wonderful because he really got to

appreciate what gentle touch feels like

my mommy feel what that touch feels like

that a nice touch mommy very teaching

gentle touch instead of the aggressive

things that zach is used to doing with

his hands thought I was a great game

Zach did you enjoy that game mm-hmm

touching game mortified it is really

important that we always are kind with

our touch and you felt what that felt

like when you had nice things on you it

was just a really kind of cuddly special

moment when they were in his bedroom and

I just felt it would be a really

positive way to reinforce nice touch

between the pair of them and not what

they were used to on a daily basis I

will play it again that's nice right I

want to play it again nice touch

whilst that was sitting on the naughty X

mom really confided in me with why she

does most of the discipline and I found

out it's because dad is overly

aggressive this thing is like squeezing

really hard I've seen him do it yeah it

took the muscle and to bring him down

when bill puts Zach on that time out

that he's rough handling yes huh yeah no

good table ID Zach's cry that it's more

than just I mean it tells me that he's

possibly in pain I am afraid to hand

over discipline to bill when I can't be

there to witness it because he does

squeeze Zach's arm and he does muscle

him and I don't know what he does when

I'm not there

yeah that conversation with bill because

as long as you feel that that's going on

you're always gonna protect him because

you're going to cover up for Zach even

when you know he's wrong because you're

going to be worried about bill

disciplining him after talking to Brenda

I realized until dad can earn mum's

trust again then disciplining zach is

gonna be a real battle you were in

timeout because it asked you to leave

your sister alone I need an apology I'm

sincere apology so I was concerned how

would mom trust dad was a cacan and

unfortunately I got a chance to see

exactly what mom was talking about with

my own eyes I saw dad handle a situation

with anger and aggression

I saw him push he son to the floor where

he son lay there worried that he may get

pushed again Brenda walked back into the

room and that was a completely honest

about what has happened what are you

crying about cuz I told me get off Aaron

he's like I am because you told him to

get off and I get I heard he's breaking

her back

my fault no just push that kid your son

on the floor really aggressively I could

not look at that and let it go I really

couldn't so the kids are in the bedroom

at the moment because what I have to say

I don't want them here in at all I saw

behavior that shocked me you behave in

Bill in an unacceptable way with

Zach my first reaction get him off and

quick as I can

he pushed him full force you pushed him

off of Aaron and he lay on the floor he

lay on the floor hurt I was past I was

um definitely not a happy camper I felt

like you know here we are I am giving

more than a hundred percent trying to

make things right at all that I can you

know and it seemed like he just kind of

gave up and went back to his normal way

of dealing with things I even asked I

said why is he crying what happened

instead I push him off here I know you

didn't like back to getting more how can

you expect friends up to step back and

allow you to do discipline when inside

she's worried that you're going to grab

the kids be aggressive with them hurt

them she's gonna want to protect her

kids but from their own father and it's

not right to get up and just behave like

that and then turn around and say to

your son don't do that to your sister

don't behave like that when that's what

you choose to do I have a critical of

you and all I know is that if you're

prepared to carry on behaving like that

you will have no relationship with your

son your son won't even want to know you

they put his it down he felt ashamed so

you on my first day I wanted to

focus on parental skills because the

children's behavior is getting confused

with the families grieving process the

first step was to ask grandma to leave

so that Leslie wouldn't be dependent on

her help so that she could just stand up

on her own I am going to run out and get

a pedicure okay okay Leslie definitely

needs to feel the sense of

responsibility and independence but she

has that crutch and that's her mother

and to a degree it's been a godsend and

and not because it's made her slightly

lazy and dependent on her mother

I'm an abaya be back a little bit okay I

love you we're brand Mar gone it was

time to get these kids to act their age

write their own bottoms a right away

even gave me the chance to show Mom

exactly how

oh this is grass Eden this is good

what is she old enough for wife herself

after she poops oh yeah we've got a

five-year-old who's struggling to the

wiper and bottom I just thought I was

crazy okay this is what you want to do

wiper bottom I just got to learn to do

it herself okay go in there okay and

then tell her what to do all right

what I would do as well is that I would

keep them like wet wipes as well there

are some in there right all right it's

going to it Ohama and tell me that you

haven't done it okay she needs to learn

to do it okay yes head mom in the

bathroom teacher needs and how to take

care of herself on her own accord which

I've quite funny actually listening to

her through that door I'm gonna teach

you how to way now pull out one white

remember front to back okay I'm often

asked when should a child wipe their own

bottom typically between three and four

years old and Eden's almost five years

old so she's way older dude how many

American houses I've been into for the

kids don't wipe their own but it's quite

interesting you know you want to make

sure they're clean and you want to make

sure you know they've got good hygiene

and they're taking care of themselves

but sometimes you don't think they're

ready to do that so you're just doing it

for him good job good job Eden good job

she said I can't believe I liked myself

the next thing I needed to do was to

educate this family about the video

games rating system only 21% of kids say

that their parents have any rules about

the video games they can play so this is

information that a lot of families need

to hear lessons day game ratings all

right what does he mean everyone what's

this one that I need came out you have

to be ten which can't be understand the

Bible I did know that there was a 10 and

up I thought that any a game was

suitable for my kids some bactine

teenagers 13 it up what's this one M for

Mature meaning a game not found in our

house I played it in game before but I

don't know anymore

what was am game like shooting cussing

robbing and killing James which is the

best one to play I want to play one team

game it's not even bad let them read the

back of tea read the back of tape Hey

unchain violence gets do things

minimal blood okay so does that sound

like something that you should be

playing do we work want any of these

things in our house just the name but

it's not when you acted out learning

about the video game ratings has made

mom and dad realize they need to pack up

those teen games right away

and when James their eldest son realize

what that meant he started to get upset

okay so this should have a big red X

over it because it's not allowed in our

house nor are you allowed to play did

anyone else's house so why don't you

pick some oh but you think are allowed

here in this house when Joe showed me

the ratings for the video games I didn't

really like either I used to be able to

play teen games but now I can't

team your team is out all right all the

fun games our god I can't play my

favorite game you only had a couple

years it'll fly by I promise you before

you know it you'll be twenty wishing you

were ten again okay I feel that you know

a lot of kids get exposed to so much so

early but whilst we are in our own homes

and we have communication with our

neighbors and our friends you know we

can do as much as we possibly can to

control that situation

ultimately parents are responsible for

the video games their kids play whether

that's at a neighbor's house or in their

own home so when Holly told me that she

really didn't know how to discuss the

video games with her neighbor I took the

liberty to invite her into our home so

we could discuss this straight away what

you decide to do with your child is one

thing what you decide to do if your

child is one thing so how do we clear

that up so that James can't turn around

and say all out go around Colton's and I

can do it there and what can the pair if

you do together to make sure that that

doesn't happen

I won't like Colton play any games that

you don't want him to play right same

with you guys we won't let them play

until we talk to you and Jimmy are you

happy troubles number not yet

I know no worried it it's so important

to be able to communicate constantly

with your neighbors especially when your

kids spend so much time in each other's

homes so the nice thing is at least then

you know that you've got each other

support we're gonna converse more often

so that we know how our kids are

behaving at each others house not

government doing anything obviously Lexi

had something to hide because she didn't

want to give her password to her dad go

it was a losing battle she relented

where are those boys go to view yeah

well at least I'm not like you

do you Lexi likes Jessica so I'm mr.

Preston well you guys don't I don't like

that language oh I'm seeing a real

in Bazzle authority and you go back on

that please necessary start for I'm not

a to be missed with I'm going to kill

both of you and I really couldn't

believe what I was seeing because when

we pulled up the staff there were older

boys on that website there was obscene

language there was phases and sentences

that were scary and she's an 11 year old

girl chatting with much older boys what

I mean is this just a same

yes well how do I know I mean this is

serious stuff this goes to the next

level they are coming off and you're

gonna change everything you need to on

your computer will do this later is this

the first time that you yes everything

was never aware of this I think it's

incredibly important for parents to know

exactly what their kids are doing on the

computers well let's just turn it off

okay

the computers a day so mom gets home and

she barely has any time to check in with

dad what's he gonna Peter show your mom

everything that's on it before he goes

off to work and there it was she was

just as oblivious you don't know this

guy okay now what's this right here

are you deleting people mm-hmm okay give

me a favorite slow down so I know what

you're doing my parents are completely

clueless of the computer is this your

space right now

okay so who are all these people people

that you know yeah can you get that guy

back that you deleted so I can see why

yes you know growing up we didn't have

computers so it you know I I don't

really understand it and this guy 17 I

don't know research shows that one in

five children on the internet chat rooms

are approached by pedophiles my fear is

that parents are not going to understand

the dangers of the internet and how to

protect their kids are you deleting more

people Terrace is the first time but you

actually find it out information about

the site um I know that the both of the

girls are on it do you know I only think

about the site these parents did no

homework they didn't work out what the

site was all about that didn't work out

the protection that they could do for

their child I mean I know nothing about

this I mean I hear people talking about

it but I don't know she's logged on is

she's 14 years old

and she told me that you have to be 14

to be on this salary know if that's true

or not or if she's just saying she's 14

years old

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