How to beat A Bully
How to Stop A Bully
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Sociologists have been studying bullying for decades
They just don't call it bully, and they've always called the dominance behavior that it's other people trying to overpower
Others, and it's just like the animal Kingdom. You know the alpha male mentality
That's what's happening on campus, and so when we understand it in terms of dominance behavior
People trying to have power over another that helps us understand what to do about bullying when we really understand what it is
all the bullying experts agree on one thing that bullying is an
Imbalance of power that someone's trying to have power over you they want to see you lose and they want to win
You see the experts say it's an imbalance of power
Let me put it this way. Let's say a bully says they hate your guts. I hate your guts
if you respond out of anger
the bully loves that never
You don't care
That's the point stupid
You see the more upset you get
The more angry you get the more fun. They have
But what would happen if we were resilient everybody say resilient?
What if we were emotionally strong everybody say strong?
What if we were mentally tough everybody say tough?
Then no matter what the hater says
You wouldn't care I hate your guts
That's nice
You smell like body odor. You're nasty
Thanks for the information
Your face is ugly. You have a face of an angel three cheeks
Okay, maybe that was too far
But how awesome would it be if you the victim of relentless teasing and taunting or bullying?
Decided to not get upset to have tough skin
To allow the hateful mean words of others bounce right off you and not care what the other person says
see some people say well brooks doesn't a person have to have a high sense of self esteem to
Be able to do what you're asking
Don't they have to have you know self confidence or or a high sense of self worth no?
No
they don't if if you explain to students that bullying is nothing more than a game about winning and losing and
that the way that they can win is by not getting upset and the bully will lose and
When people lose they don't like playing the game, so they'll leave you alone when you explain that to a student. It's simple
It's concrete. It's not abstract. It's not ethereal. It's not complex. It's simple
Don't get upset no matter what they say. I'm not saying it's easy
But in logic, it's very simple now. It's important to know this when I say boolean
I'm only talking about when someone's hurting your feelings if
You can understand bullying in terms of someone hurting your feelings then the solution is very simple
But some people think bullying is more complex than hurting your feelings. They think bullying is like violence
Let me make it very clear when I say bullying. I'm not talking about when someone punches your face I
Actually believe that you know you should get upset if someone punches your face. That's not bullying that's called assault and battery okay
Don't just stand there
It's all good
No, dude. If someone straight-up punches your face get upset why cuz that's a crime. That's not bullying
it's a crime and
Crime should be punished and if you ever feel like your life is in danger. You should be protected. You should reach out for help
These are social skills that every human needs to learn because there's mean people all around us. There's jerks everywhere
Um I've discovered that when you empower kids to solve their own social problems three things happen number one. They grow in Self-esteem
They grow in self-confidence, and they grow in self-worth all three words. Have one word in common self
You can't do it for the kid he has to do it for himself and only when he solves the problem for himself
Does he grow in Self-esteem self-confidence and self-worth and that's what we should be doing every victim of bullying
deserves the right to be taught how to solve their own social problems and
That's what we need to move towards. I believe now this game. I want you to call me an idiot
I'm gonna try to get you to stop being mean you can make fun of my high forehead my pointy nose
You can make fun of my ugly clothes. Here's how the game works, it's pretty brilliant
I'm gonna try to get you to stop being mean and if I can stop you from being mean I win
But if I can't stop you, and you keep being mean to me you win, okay?
So the goal is not to give up you call me an idiot and you keep making fun of me
I'm gonna try to stop you on the count of three everyone say action one two three
Call me an idiot you're an idiot what you say you're an idiot. You're an idiot you're ugly
It hurts my feelings
Yeah, like I care
I'm Gonna get you in trouble sure short stuff
I'm taller than you, shut up
You called me an idiot one more time, and I will win they'll kick your face
Like I care like you could do anything in those clothes
These clothes are freakin awesome. Okay sure plaid and sweater vests. Oh you have eyes you can see
Stop being me. I hate your face
Stop being me. I hate blonde people
Alright give her a big hand clap. She did great
Alright now hold on hold on good job
all right, I
Tried to stop you. I couldn't you did a great job?
We're gonna play one last time same rules. You can call me an idiot. I'm gonna try to stop you
Don't let me stop you. Okay. You keep being mean to me you think I can stop her
Alright. I'll try here. We go on the count of three everyone say action one two three
Go and call me an idiot you're an idiot. Oh you think I'm an idiot yeah, yeah, sometimes I do stupid things. That's true
Yeah, you do you always do stupid things. I know you're so smart you're so lucky
Yes, I am
You're awesome
Thank you, and you're not I
Don't know we established that go look my happiness is not based on whether you think I'm cool or not
I'm gonna be happy even if you hate my guts
Okay
And I'll always be nice to you, sweetheart
Okay
no, isn't she
Thank you, you're welcome. I want give me a big hand clap that was awesome
