How to Forgive and Let Go of Your Past - Joyce Meyer

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if people can understand that as long as

they don't forgive they're poisoning

themselves it's like hating somebody

who's hurt you is like taking poison

hoping they'll die it's like me being

mad at somebody who hurt me that's out

having a good time and don't even care

that I'm mad that doesn't hurt them yeah

and so maybe this husband has been gone

20 years and he's been having a good

time in life and you know he's married

again and whatever and he couldn't care

less that she's mad and still suffering

he's moved on sadly but he's moved on

and so it's it's pointless it's like

okay you hurt me but now if I'm gonna

hate you then I'm letting you continue

to hurt me and have control in my life

and you're controlling my life and I'm

not gonna do that

but John I think the other part of this

is and I think this is very important I

think a lot of people want to forgive

but they don't know how to do it and so

as I've pondered this and studied it and

prayed about it the things that I feel

like I've learned from God is this first

of all - to do anything you need to do

it the way God tells you to do it and so

he said several different places in the

Bible that you pray for your enemies so

first of all are you praying for people

that have hurt you well what do you pray

I mean we're like well I don't really

want them to be blessed

I could have pray for them to be black

but the truth is is really I mean you

can take somebody that's really hurt you

and ask God to bless them and the first

thing he's going to bless them with is

revelation of what they've done because

they can't really have a right

relationship with him if they don't

admit what they've done and come to a

place of truth in their life God desires

truth in the inner being was what King

David said after his shenanigans

whistled with Bathsheba and he went a

whole year without confessing his sin I

guess making all kinds of excuses for it

then Psalm 51 the great prayer that he

prayed he said you desire truth in the

inner being so every person before they

can have a right relationship with God

they have to face the truth

you can't get to where you need to be if

you don't face the truth about where

you're at and so for forgiveness I don't

think you can ever walk through I can

decide I'm gonna forgive somebody but I

can't walk it out in my life if there's

not some things that I realize first of

all God's not asking me to feel

differently about them he's asking me to

pray to bless and not curse which if you

study that it means to speak even to

speak well of instead of evil of so I

need to stop talking about them in an

unkind way change your vocabulary change

your vocabulary so when I talk about

what my dad did to me I don't do it to

put him down

I do it to help other people so if I'm

talking about it with a good motive

that's one thing but if I'm talking

about it just to be talking about it and

out of your own pain and out of my own

pain and out of my own bitterness then

that's another story now that doesn't

mean you can't go get counseling if you

need it or something like that but bless

your enemies and do not curse them how

many times do we read that don't even

have a clue what is talking about so I

pray for you I pray that God will bless

you I pray you'll be saved I pray that

God will open your eyes

you know I pray in obedience to God and

I mean I've even prayed and said you

know God I don't really want you to

bless them but you told me to pray for

that so I'm gonna and God and God's not

uncomfortable dr. got to pray in

obedience anyway and then I make a

decision to stop talking about them yeah

and then I so I decide what I'm gonna do

I pray I trust and then even if I still

feel like I'm angry I don't say well I

haven't forgiven because I still feel

this way I say god I've done my part now

your part is to change how I feel and so

an example that I can think of if you

want to take this a little bit further

there was somebody that I went to church

with one time that hurt me really really

really bad I mean really bad I won't get

into the details but one night we're in

church and the pastor did what pastors

love to do we'll go and hug somebody and

tell them you love them so I turned the

first person I see is her and I'm

thinking ain't no way no way am i

hugging you and

I love you yeah and but I knew in the

pit of my gut but that's what God wanted

me to do okay well I didn't want to I

didn't feel like it but you can still do

in obedience to God what he tells you to

do even if you don't want to and you

don't feel like it and those are the

things really I think that break the

enemy's power off of us

when no matter how we feel we will go

and obey God anyway yeah it is that we

don't go my feelings we go by faith and

we go in obedience and then when we

stake that simple medians God give us a

power and a blessing to us for that act

of obedience but you know a lot of times

we learn little nifty phrases like that

we walk by faith and not by sight but we

don't really apply it sure to a

situation like that yeah and so I had to

literally in faith go and do what God

told me to even though I didn't feel

like it you know what I've learned

that's really good when you do what's

right when you feel all wrong about it

boy that's when you're growing

spiritually that's the stretch

that's the stretch that's when you're

growing spiritually and you know what

course it's been a long journey and I

didn't learn this overnight I won't stay

mad at somebody now it's just I'm not

doing that I don't have time to be angry

I'm not wasting any more of my life

being mad at people you're so

unproductive that doesn't mean that I

don't get hurt it doesn't mean that it's

easy but you know the Bible says to

bless those who curse you and one of the

things that's great to do I tell pastors

all the time if you have some young man

that you've mentored and loved and he

splits your church and takes a hundred

of your people down the street and

starts his own church don't hate him by

Masson systems take up an offering yeah

go take up an offering for him because

yeah that's the way to do because we

overcome evil with good that's right

I mean Romans 12:21 I'm getting the

devil back not every day that I opened

my mouth and share God's Word that's how

I get the devil back not by hating the

man who hurt me