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hey guys welcome back to my channel I'm

so sorry about this makeshift setup

still I usually would film with nice

lights and a good background but I just

don't have access to any of those things

right now because we're moving my house

is a mess so I'm sorry about that but

welcome back nonetheless today I have a

new video for you guys

I took your guys's questions on

Instagram and I went through them and I

decided on a few topics that I wanted to

help you guys and one of them won't you

be talking about with you guys today and

that is how to ask someone out without

ruining the friendship this is such a

complicated thing I've gotten this

question a lot so we're just gonna get

right on into it okay so you're in this

friendship with a girl and you want to

take it a step further you want to ask

her on potentially a date but you don't

want to jeopardize the friendship now

first of all I'm going to have to burst

your bubble a little bit because in some

sense it's not completely possible the

risk that something is going to change

even just a little bit about your guys's

friendship right now is pretty high but

what you do need to understand is that

time can heal a lot if you continue to

nurture the friendship even after this

may have gone wrong there doesn't mean

that you can never go back to the

friendship time can really make it kind

of disappear and fade into the

background I've had friends who have

dated in the past and are not dating

anymore in their friends again it took a

little while for them to kind of forget

about what happened and to ease back

into the normal list of being friends

again but it did definitely totally

happen and so that's possible for you

too so do remember that but there is a

risk involved and where you're gonna

have to do and I've said this before a

few times is you're gonna have to think

about is it worth the risk for me right

now do you want to date her so badly

that you would actually take the risk of

jeopardizing the friendship if the

friendship is unbearable to you because

you cannot stop thinking about wanting

to take it further then it's just a good

risk to take because even if she says no

it's still better than being stuck in

the situation that you're in right now

so do keep that in mind and make a

conscious decision that yeah not


go as you planned and are you going to

be okay with that and if you are then

you can move on with the next couple

steps so basically what it comes down to

and this is something I pressure I think

you press I think a lot is honesty

honesty is always the best idea make

sure that you are very raw and real with

your feelings and what you want to say

or what you think about it and don't try

to filter it don't try to find a good

way of saying and just say bluntly what

it's about be very honest just tell her

listen I really felt your friendship and

I'm thinking about it for a while now

and I feel like I would like to take a

next step and to go on a date with you

would you be interested in that that's

just very plain right there's no tricks

there's no clever ways of saying it it's

just plainly what you're thinking

another person can only accept that

you're not trying to trick her into

saying yes or no you're just cleanly

saying I feel like I would like to take

a next step with you would you be

interested in that and by asking such a

direct question you give her the

opportunity to give a really direct

response back to you that's a really

important thing as well

so she just can feel safe to say well I

actually would not feel comfortable

doing that or I would and if she says no

she says well I would not really be

comfortable do you Matt then we get to

the important part

how to make sure that that does not

jeopardize your friendship so what

you're gonna have to do area to be

prepared to do this is you're gonna not

overreact you're gonna completely

respect her response in the situation

because you should know you're putting

her in situation to if she's honest with

you and tells you about frontally I

don't feel like that would be a good

idea you have to be respectful that she

had the courage to tell you that upfront

as well so we're just gonna have to

remain calm just tell her well I respect

you for telling me that I did want to

ask because I did not want to walk

around with the pass

believe it in my mind we just got me

home okay and that's okay I respect that

I would love to continue to just be

friends with you if that would be okay

with you two and she most likely will

say that's totally fine and you can just

continue to just be normal to her if you

still can if you still feel like you you

want to with her because maybe at that

point you're like well I don't want to

be in contact with you anymore because I

feel rejected and that's totally fine -

you're totally entitled to your own

feelings and emotions when it comes to

situation but if you just tell her

that's fine I would love to just still

be friends with you

I just wanted to know because I felt

like I wanted the possibility out of my

head and I wanted it out but if you

still want your friends that's I would

love to and then just go back to how it

was if you still want to if you feel

like that's hard for you you don't want

to then maybe you should take a little

bit disses but that's totally up to you

that's totally fine don't bring it up

anymore just go back and you will see

that time will heal this and it will

eventually be able to go back to how it

was before if you just don't change your

behavior from what it was before you so

I hope that was helpful as you guys know

you can actually ask me advice

personally if you have a scenario and

you're like I want to know what Koko

things I should do right now

there's my cameo come it's linked down

below you can actually ask me a question

and I will record a video message for

you personally telling you what I think

you should do in your situation

so that's linked down below and also you

can ask some questions on advice on

Instagram but I will not personally be

replying to that I can make videos about

that if I feel like your topic would be

applicable to more people so I hope that

you enjoyed and I'll see you later